Late last month, media across China reported on the latest incident of harassment directed at a newlywed bride — a practice known in China as “wedding hazing” (婚闹). The news story was prompted by the surfacing on September 25 of a video showing a woman in Shanxi province tied to a telephone pole, crying for help while bystanders failed to intervene. The footage quickly went viral, igniting outrage — and prompting widespread debate about the lines between custom, decency and legality in modern Chinese society.
Chinese Business View (华商报), a commercial newspaper from Shaanxi province, managed to reach a certain “Mr. Yang” who had taken the video in question and posted it to social media. Yang said the incident had happened around midday on September 23 in the Digou Community (底沟社区) in the prefectural-level city of Yangquan in Shanxi province. He defended the actions shown in the video. “When weddings happen making a bit of a fuss, that’s our local custom,” he said. “It’s all good friends together. It’s not as netizens say, that anyone is getting hurt.”
In a subsequent report, Yangquan Daily (阳泉日报), the local CCP-run daily newspaper in Yangquan, reported that community personnel had investigated the case and found that the scene shown in the video was part of a pre-arranged “game” (游戏) arranged for the bride and groom as part of wedding festivities. The report said that those involved in the antics were “deeply sorry for the negative impact [the video] created.”
But even in the face of these rationalizations, many Chinese did not find the incident funny, or accept the suggestion that it had all been good-spirited fun. An article on the incident posted to the Sohu.com web portal said that abusive behavior at odds with contemporary values was often being rationalized “under the banner of ‘consent'” (“征得同意”的旗号下). The article spoke of the progressive “alienation” (异化) and “abuse” (滥用) of culture and customs. “True wedding celebrations should enhance joy and convey blessings,” it said, “not be used to satisy the lurid curiosity of some, or to vent personal desires.”
Even in the face of these rationalizations, many Chinese did not find the incident funny, or accept the suggestion that it had all been good-spirited fun.
In another commentary shared by several outlets, including the official Xinhua News Agency, the day after the video prompted a wave of online anger, Guangming Online (光明网) called the incident an example of “vulgar behavior” (低俗行为). No such acts should be tolerated, it said, regardless of whether or not the bride and groom had consented on the grounds that this was a local custom.
In a recent article, The Paper (澎湃) shared a series of graphics condemning “the evil custom of wedding hazing” and calling for “civilized wedding ceremonies.” The Shanghai-based outlet also suggested ways to avoid participating in or becoming a victim to hazing rituals, ranging from gentle dissuasion to legal recourse. It also recommends that victims of “wedding hazing” seek professional psychiatric help to recover.
Ritual Humiliation
“Wedding hazing” is a long-standing cultural tradition in China. Historical texts from the Eastern Han dynasty (25-220 AD) recount crude and sometimes violent customs, including physical assaults on both brides and grooms. In the past, this served to break the ice between the bride and groom — often strangers until their wedding day — and to create a jovial atmosphere. Today, acts of “wedding hazing” can also become social media memes, exposing individuals of all genders to online harassment as they are coerced into partaking in these humiliating acts.
In 2021, The Paper compiled several of the most egregious examples of “wedding hazing” from the past two decades, including shocking acts of violence disguised as tradition. In 2016, for example, a nearly naked groom in Yunnan was tied to a tree, then doused with ink and pelted with eggs by his groomsmen. In such cases, according to The Paper’s critical appraisal, “wedding hazing” serves as an excuse for abusive behavior rather than a genuine cultural practice.
“Tying someone to a pole is a tradition I cannot support.”
The cruel September incident in Shanxi — available here, but not for the faint of heart — has rekindled concern and shock among China’s netizens and media outlets, with many suggesting the custom must be ended. “Tying someone to a pole is a tradition I cannot support,” said one user commenting online. “The bride looks utterly miserable,” said another. Dezhou Daily (德州日报), a CCP-affiliated local newspaper in Shandong province, said on September 27 that society as a whole must take action to abolish this custom. The paper called on all segments of society to “advocate for new ways to celebrate weddings,” emphasizing that each individual has a role in fostering change.
